Smiles and Diamonds

OH MAN. I am BAD at keeping secrets. It just kills me. Seriously, if you hate me, tell me something and force me to keep it to myself. I can almost never do it and I always almost die from the stress of trying. But I DID keep this one thing secret and now the official announcement is made so I can FINALLY holler from the hilltops: Beau and Anna are coming back to Alberta! YEEEEAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! God. I don't know how we made it this long without them. Everything is going to be so much nicer now.

Here is a print that Justin Lafontaine made when Beau and Anna left. Hearts and tears. That's what it was like:

Now it will be the opposite! Smiles and diamonds! I can't wait for that homecoming party.
(Check out more of Justin's brilliance here: http://www.jlafonta.com/ )

Speaking of parties, I am getting a christmas tree this year, I have decided. (That is not really about parties, but I did a quick party/Christmas party season/Christmas decorating Christmas tree mental jump. Annnyway:) Actually, the Mr.'s mom talked me into it. Mr.'s a total grinch, and I can't really blame him because so many things about Christmas are just AWFUL, but I like decorating things and Christmas decorating is like a burlesque costume for your house, and also I am a crow and go mental for anything sparkly so basically christmas decorations are like MDMA to me. So I am doing it. It is going to be awesome. Check out the tree that Mr's mom picked out for me:

Amazing. It is 2 meters tall, just to put that in perspective. Those will be tall enough to stand under and do a festive hula. I am going to invent millions of festive cocktails featuring Malibu Rum, Creme de Banane maraschino cherries and pineapple juice. It's going to be GREAT.
 
 So the Refinery party was the greatest thing ever. Say what you want about Dirt Town, people in this city know how to dress up for a party. Lumberjacky! Never ones to miss an opportunity for a dirty joke, Capital City Burlesque went as nature's lumberjacks... beavers. (Pause for applause).

This seems kind of related to the Refinery party's Northern Explorer's and the Monsters Who Killed Them theme:

Monster skin rug!! This cute attack is made by Stitches and Glue. So cute. I totally want one. I don't think it would go over too well at my place... I kind of can't stop laughing thinking about Hector trying to figure out what the fuck it is....

"Hrrrrrnnn, I am confuuused..."

Oh! Holy crap. This is 100% awesome. Check out this photo project by Irina Werning:

 

The project is called back to the future. She finds these old photographs of people and restages them in the original location with the original people. So awesome.

There are so many that are really great, I recommend checking out the whole collection. It has the names of the people and the dates of the original photos too, which makes it extra awesome.

http://irinawerning.com/back-to-the-fut/back-to-the-future/

It is almost go home from work o'clock so I'm bailing on this a little early, but before I go, please check out this nail polish by STRANGEBEAUTIFUL. They are sold in "libraries" rather than individually and each library is inspired by a set of images, scents, objects. Some are lovely. Some are gross. All are awesome. This smart idea comes from Jane Schub, an illustrator turned cosmetics designer. The crossover between the two mediums is pretty obvious  in these products. Beautiful.

The following descriptions of color collections provided by STRANGEBEAUTIFUL.

Volume 1

Above: Josef Albers Color Theory, A Mid Century Modern Knoll Fabric, Oscar Wilde, the exuberant paint colors used to decorate the walls of the Federalist period, a color of an Andy Warhol painting at the Dia Museum, the color Puce which I remember mixing when oil painting as a child, a green - winged teal, the dark inky blue of a never ending deep lake at night and the fear of swimming in it, and of course the red Valentine typewriter.

Volume 2

Above: An interesting color palette of camo called Tan and Water Camo used by an elite German anti- terrorist unit. The slate blue color of a uniform in an 1846 N.Currier print “The Death of the Gallant Major Ringgold).Violette (Pansy Violet) ink from the venerable French ink company J. Herbin founded in 1670, the dull red color of a lobster shell immediately after it has been removed from boiling water.

Volume 3

Above: The veins of green mold running through Roquefort, the artist Sean Scully, the rich black olive green color of Loden cloth, aged Armagnac, the dull brown red of Red Rope files, the saturated rusty iron color of an Irish bog caused by the reaction between tannin, wood and iron, Raymond Loewy, the belly of a pigeon, and the dreadfully wonderful dirty almond color used on kitchen appliances.

Volume 4

Above: The gradation of color on the fur of a taxidermy caribou head; Oeil De Perdrix (partridge – eye); Pink color of Rose champagne; The poem Lapis Lazuli by William Butler Yeats; A very wrong color choice of a cheap foundation; Verdigris; An orange turban in a 15th Century Florentine portrait titled Matteo Olivieri; Aged Chartreuse; Borscht.

Volume 5

Above: The vampiric gradations of a healing bruise; the moody rusts of menstrual blood; sooty, phantasmal India ink; the profile of a gray blue Heron scooping fish against a background of gooey river runoff and the apocalyptic color palette of Medieval Flemish paintings.

Unlike traditional nail polishes, the Volume 5 shades coat the nail in a gossamer bath of color. Not quite transparent, the effect is fluid and semi opaque, as if the nail itself had taken on a mysterious life of its own.

Library of Camo Nail Polishes

Above: The neutralized sand- pink background of the French desert camouflage “Daguet”, a washed out color palette of Snow Shadow camouflage used to match snowy terrain for winter hunting, Tropical variant camouflage of the Russian Federation, the simple elegant palette of the 3-way desert battle dress camouflage used by the Israeli army, Belgian desert jigsaw camouflage, the beautiful watery blots of color almost “Fragonard” in feeling of the Czechoslovakian 5 color desert camouflage.

The Dickension Volume

Above: For this collection, creator Jane Schub drew inspiration from photographer Joel - Peter Witkin, Edward Gorey‘s The Loathsome Couple, the Brothers Grimm, a lump of coal, a piece of broken shale and Dickens.

Ok! That is all. I am out of here.
Before I go, let's listen to this old and good thing together and shake our Thursday cans:

xo!

Quote of the weak

I just read a T.S. Elliott quote that said something like 'the natural state of a creative person is anxiety'. (Sorry, I know I butchered that. If you are a T.S. Elliott purist and I have offended you, I am 50% sorry but also 50% think you should get a life.)

I wonder if it's true though, you know? On one hand, there are all these people make it look easy, like they breathe and make art with the same level of difficulty and volition. But how? It seems like there is never enough time in the day and everything is so distracting and it is so hard to know if what you are doing is worth anything, even to yourself let alone anyone else, and if you ever stop everyone will forget that you ever existed at all and everything just moves so fast and suddenly you're so old... Lots of anxiety seems to come from the idea that I have more anxiety than most, being an utter fucking fraud. How do people just DO and just KNOW? I have no idea.

In any case, it is kind of comforting having someone speak with authority on the things you secretly wonder when you can't sleep at night.

Also, like I have a single fucking thing to complain about.  If this were even 50 years ago, none of this would even be an issue because I would be a wife and mother and that would just be... it. No one is starving. No one is impeding on my right to do much of anything that I want to do. I bitch and moan about art because I have the privilege of bitching and moaning about art. Ugh. What a jerkoff. If I spent as much time making stuff as I do delivering stern lectures at myself, though, there would be no bitching and moaning at all. Anyway, that sorta circular logic doesn't help get things done.

Speaking of quotes, the Mr.'s dad threw this one at me a few months back: (It's John Adams! Doesn't that make me seem SMART??) "I must study politics and war, that our sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. Our sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history and naval architecture, navigation, commerce and agriculture in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture, statuary, tapestry and porcelain."

Like I said, if this were even 50 tiny little years ago, I would not be complaining at all....


Ok. Enough Novembery complaining. Check out Pamela Love, who makes the pretty shiny things most recently dazzling my magpie eyes:

Please, someone, give this to me immediately.

One more pretty thing:
A recycled wood corset that makes my heart flutter...

Also this is pretty funny: http://moustair.tumblr.com/

(via Lost at E Minor)

I have decided on an exciting adventure for the spring and now (hint) I need to make some quick money. I am going to do some shameless self promotion here in a little bit, and I'm sorry, I will try not to be tacky about it, but I need to sell some arts and things and get the hell out of Dirt Town for a little while, or these mopey bummer blogs are going to be coming fast and furious all winter long.

The AGA's Refinery Party is coming up pretty soon, that is exciting. (Look at this promo photo by Fish Griwkowsky!) The Lumberjack Formal dress code is getting me pretty excited. I have so many options that I may have to pull a costume change or two over the course of the night.

Capital City Burlesque's contribution is going to be pretty adorable, I think. And funny. I am really excited about the whole thing. The sneak peek photos that have been circulating of the monsters that Smokey and Josh Holinaty are making for the event look pretty amazing. I think this is going to be one of those events that gives us all the feeling that we're all going to be alright. Good timing.

Okay, before I go, one more quote that is possibly my all-time favorite, although I reserve my right to contradict or change my mind about that at any time...
"Quand on est dans la merde jusqu'au cou, il ne reste plus qu'a chanter." (Samuel Beckett)

Ok! That's all for now!
xo!

Bummer

It's happened. November downer times have smashed my face in like Mac truck full of turds. I know it happens every year, but woah man. Dire. Extra weird because the snow hasn't even hit yet. There is only one thing to do, and that's to listen to the most fretful music there is, max your credit card buying swarovski crystals and furs and ostrich feathers on ebay so you can drape yourself in something more melodramatic than your wintertime feelings, and swirl around until spring hits. Take breaks for whiskey and intercourse.

Here, I'll get you started:

Why not wear a beautiful hat while you are crying about it, you melancholy hookerpirate?

Ahoy. (via topsyturvydesign.com)  These are seriously the kinds of things that I am making in my costume room right now. I don't even care, I am just going to start wearing giant fucking satin hats and capes and carrying canes. 

Anyway at least winter party season is starting soon.

Let's just all stay at least a tiny bit drunk until May. Ok?

Smash!

Recipe: eat kettle chips out of a dirty saucepan because who even cares about ANYTHING?